Friday, August 8, 2014

Appreciation Day: Reflective Blog

All I can say is that a new beginning is coming toward all of us Ivy League Ladies '14 in the future. We have grown so much from this experience—journey I should say. I have seen so much improvement, academic wise, and also in our inner character. I have learned a lot about these Nemow's stories. And I have never been closer to them than what we are now. We have stayed with each other through the good and bad times—seen each other in our highs and lows. Nevertheless, this has been more than what I could've ever asked for.

After sleepless nights of trying to pour out my day on my blog every night, blogging was a way to reflect upon my day. Even though I would be exhausted from all the activities that were planned for that day like visiting schools or taking long car rides, I would learn something from everything we would do. I appreciate the fact that I was accepted into this program and had the opportunity to travel for free. If it wasn't for this program, I fear that I would've gotten a late start in picking the right college for me.

Blogging was always filled with a whole bunch of realizations and connections that I had made that day.  My mind has been taught to put into words everything I was thinking when, before, I wasn't able to. For example, I strongly believe that I can articulate what I’m thinking way more than before because I have the practice to type it onto the screen.

I have learned so much these past three weeks, everything is just jumbled in my head, and I am still trying to make sense of it all. But, I do know that I want to share my knowledge with everyone because I know how grateful I am that I had the opportunity to do so. My life has changed for the better and I hope that by me transferring my knowledge to other people, it will inspire other people to take action. I have the motivation and dedication to make my community a better place now because I see that we have to start somewhere. I expect a lot out of me. Before this program, I didn't have a reason why I should do anything.  For once in my life I believe in my ability and potential and I love this feeling.

I can no longer go back to that place or be that person I once was where I had a mindset of laying low. I have to believe in my ability because if I don't, then who will? I was not aware of all the opportunities that were always around me and I feel so foolish for not taking advantage of everything that was out there for me.  I just can't go back. I won't go back. I am a different person—a better, more confident version of myself.

I have always had a mentality of fending for myself and counting on my own strength to get me through every obstacle. I learned that most of the time, you can't do everything by yourself.  I thought that people like me had a low chance of graduating college without debt after more debt. Schools like Brown. have a tremendous amount of financial aid and require you to pay very little. All I really need to do is ask, find and apply to as much help as I can. I really have nothing to lose.

The classes I took at Brown for a Women and Leadership course have to be the best decision I have ever made.  I absolutely loved waking up every morning just to go to class and I believe that is how school is supposed to be. I have a craving to learn and I have never learned so much in just two weeks. I thought it was impossible but, it happened.  I saw the world around me for what it really was. All the good and all the bad things which only made me more eager to learn more and more.  I wish everyone would have the same opportunity that I had because it is life changing. This world is so confusing and unique and will never cease to surprise us, why wouldn't anyone want to know what is out there?

I wish high school could be like that but students just don't care about their education.  It is always something that gets in the way like for me, the lack of resources and inspiration.  I didn't see anyone who did great things in my community so I didn't know why I had to do something either. I am so dumb for thinking that I had nothing to offer the world and that wasn't the case at all. If that was true, I wouldn't have been selected to participate in this program.

I have reached my potential in this experience and all I want to do now is reach higher and higher. I cannot find a way to tell everyone who helped me in any was how grateful I am for this reality check. Mr. Peritz, Don, my counselor, and Don again because he showed so much interest in my education. We need a lot more people like them because they are the true heroes behind every person's success.

Thank you all.

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